Things I’ve learned this Week – Plus Announcements!

1. Driving down an extremely foggy highway at 3am while listening to Portishead is not conducive to a stable mental state.

2. I am willing to pay full admission price to watch a 6 minute clip of “The Dark Knight Rises”

3. Pastor’s wives spit.

4. I am growing more and more comfortable with calling teenage boys “punks”

5. All formal models of education can fundamentally be reduced to basic moral statements.

6. It’s a good idea to check who is behind your friend before you point at him and say that he is a member of the Taliban.

7. Pringles are never not good.

8. When strapped for time and creativity, the list format is a cheap, easy way to get a blog post done.

Anouncement 1!

It is my supreme pleasure to announce this blog’s new (and inaugural) mascot: Fat Joker

He’ll be around to offer his invaluable commentary whenever he can. He is an inspiration and an icon of wisdom and good judgement.

Anouncement 2!

We all know that this blog does a lot of good for the world (evidence is pictured above), but I thought it would be a good idea to support some other people doing some good. A couple of friends of mine have decided to do the Ride to Conquer Cancer, which, if you aren’t familiar, is a bike ride from Vancouver to Seattle to raise money for cancer research. They each have to raise $2500 to participate, so they need all the help they can get. If they don’t raise all of it, what they do raise will still go to cancer research, but they want to actually do the ride as well. The story behind their decision to do this is genuinely touching, so go to their team page or their individual pages (Rory, Tamara) to get more information and donate.

If being nice for a goddamn change isn’t a good enough reason for you to donate, how about this: The ride is going to be extremely difficult to both train for and complete, and will likely result in a fair amount of (at least physical) suffering for both of them. I like to see my friends suffering in various ways, so if you want to help me make my friends suffer, while at the same time impressing that girl/guy you are trying to bang, toss these two some cash. Do ittt.

What do you think about this, Fat Joker?

"Needs more chaos. And ham."

Well put.


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